This piece was inspired by Kurt Elling’s rendition of Carla Bley’s ‘Endless Lawns’.
Have you ever looked out of a train window as the raindrops race down the glass? Some raindrops move faster than others. Sometimes the raindrops bump into others, combine and descend even faster. They can even ascend depending on the fluid dynamics. I can stare at the window for a very long time watching this happen. This track feels like raindrops on a train window.
Sadness is a weighty emotion, a perceptual congealant, forcing us to process life at a slower pace. Yet sad things are somehow beautiful. Mono no aware according to the Japanese. When we are sad, life slows down, and we comprehend the specific qualities of our experience — qualities not easily accessible when life is experienced at a faster tempo.
There are many sad, but beautiful sounds in this song — Elling’s voice, Marquis Hill’s muted trumpet, the pianist’s accompaniment and the lyrics themselves.
Afloat and all at sea
The stars align in threes
They’re so fine and free in blue and in green
Like leaves on endless trees
I savour every long sad note. In fact, the longer the better.
In our lives, some things change quickly, whilst others change slowly. Much of our experienced catharsis comes from the realisation that we are in the middle of things changing at different relative speeds.
What does it mean to observe the Orion constellation in the night sky as a dreamy youth, and then later as a weathered man during a dark night of the soul, seeing no apparent change in the star, yet a chasm of change within oneself, as Elling’s lyrics depict?
I don’t know.
But like the transience of watching raindrops move across a train window, there is a sad beauty in merely contemplating the question.
